10 Steps to Becoming a Powerful Listener

Let me ask you a simple question. Are you a good listener? Now you might believe you’re a good listener, but just stop for a moment and think; how would the following people rate you as a listener – your best friend, your boss, your employees, colleagues and even your nearest and dearest. Rather not think about it eh!

Let me give you some facts and figures about listening that have been established by research.
G R Bell established in 1984 studies that adults typically practise listening at no better than 25 per cent efficiency. In 1983 G T Hunt and A P Cusella reported how well Training Directors in Fortune 500 companies rated the listening effectiveness of managers and subordinates in their organisations. Ratings averaged 1.97 on a 5-point scale, somewhere between “fair” and “poor.”
Other studies suggest that 60-70 per cent of oral communication is either ignored, misunderstood or quickly forgotten. After 48 hours people are likely to retain less than 25 per cent of what they heard in a conversation.

Now I’m sure this makes a lot of sense to you because one of the most common complaints I hear from managers and employees is – “My manager doesn’t listen to me!”
It’s also one of the reasons why difficulties arise in our personal life. How often have people headed to the divorce court saying – “He never listens to me!” or “She doesn’t understand me!”

Listening is a very powerful management skill and if you want to become a Motivational Manager and minimise your stress then you need to become a Powerful Listener.
Powerful listening isn’t about hearing; it’s about really understanding the message that the other person is sending and letting them know that you understand and care about what they’re saying.

Hearing doesn’t take any effort; however listening, takes a great deal of concentration and effort. Of course, it gets easier with training and practise, so don’t give up on me yet.
It’s important to understand why listening can be difficult and there are whole lists of reasons why people don’t listen well. One of the main reasons is that we can be distracted both internally and externally.
People have the ability to think at around 400-700 words per minute. People talk at about 120-150 words per minute. So in any interaction there’s a huge amount of spare brain capacity unused by the listener.
Because we all have so many other things going on in our lives, it’s so easy to let our mind ‘wander off’ and use that surplus brain capacity to think about something else, when someone is speaking to us. We might have personal concerns that pop into our mind such as issues with our partners or children.
Listening can also be difficult if we’re tired, bored, in a hurry, confused or can’t make out or understand what the other person is saying.

Here are 10 key steps to becoming a Powerful Listener:
1. Listen logically – stay emotionally detached and listen for facts, ideas and details
2. Stimulate the speaker – nod your head, lean forward, keep good eye contact and concentrate totally
3. Make notes – if relevant get all the details down
4. Shut out distractions – change your environment or shut out all distractions in your mind
5. Listen between the lines for hidden meanings – listen to the emotional meaning of the speaker
6. Use your intuition and trust your gut feeling
7. Observe non-verbal clues – watch body language, be aware of what people are not saying
8. Listen for what people would like to say but have difficulty putting into words
9. Don’t pre-judge – keep an open mind
10. Don’t interrupt or jump in with an answer or solution

Commit to practising your listening skills everyday. Whenever you come into contact with someone, be it in business or socially, really listen to that person. It’s like any other skill, the more you practise the better you’ll become. (And just think how much you will learn)

Can’t Buy Me Love

You might disagree but hear me out on this. Money does not motivate employees!
In 1964 The Beatles sang – “Money Can’t Buy Me Love” and it certainly won’t buy you loyalty or team motivation.
And yet; when I’m running a Motivational Manager Seminar, some managers come back at me with statements such as:

• “My people are only interested in the money”



• “That’s why they come to work”



• “Sales people are motivated by money, that’s why we pay them commission and bonuses”



• “You try reducing their money and see what happens”

Let me say now; if you want to become a successful Motivational Manager please accept that for the majority of employees – money is not a motivator!

The psychologist Frederick Herzberg developed his ‘Two Factor’ theory in 1959 and established that money is not a motivator। However, if it’s inadequate, then it can be a de-motivating factor. In other words, it can adversely affect job performance.

If you were able to increase the salary of your employees by 5000 pounds, dollars or whatever currency you pay them in, then I’m sure they’d be really pleased and motivated to do well – but for how long? I reckon that within a couple of months that extra 5000 would be accepted as the norm with virtually no effect on motivation। And don’t think it matters if it was 10000 pounds or dollars, after a while it wouldn’t make a difference।

Yes there are people who are motivated purely by money; however, they tend to be in the minority.

The majority of employees are motivated by other factors and these are often more easily delivered than extra money. Many managers are unable to raise the salary paid to their employees as this is usually decided by company policy.

Employees can be motivated by several factors in relation to their work. Here are three things you can do:

1. Make their job more interesting by:

• Giving them more responsibility
• Giving them some of your tasks
• Asking them to train or mentor another member of your team
• Asking them to sit in occasionally on management meetings
• Giving them further training

2. Give them feedback and appreciation for what they do by:

• The occasional gift
• Time off work
• Gift vouchers
• Personal thank you letters

3. Make them feel ‘in on things’ by:

• Letting them attend meetings and conferences if they don’t already
• Letting them run a team meeting
• Listening to their opinions on how to run the team
• Listening to their feedback

I feel sure you can add several other things to these lists and put this to the test right away.

News Release

You Don't Have To Be a Tough Guy to Motivate Your 'Apprentice'

"You're Fired!" Sir Alan Sugar's immortal catchphrase was once again directed at unsuccessful candidates in the fourth series of The Apprentice, recently concluded on BBC Two.

This high flying self-made billionaire is portrayed as a tough no nonsense individual who fires people who don't come up to the mark.

Other 'tough guys' were recently referred to by Ruairi O'Kane in an article in the Sunday Times. He reports that bullying bosses who copy the behaviour of the celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay and Simon Cowell, the X Factor judge, have been blamed for a doubling in the number of employment tribunal cases over the past year.

We've all heard the old cliché, 'nice guys don't finish first' and, Edinburgh based Alan Fairweather, 'The Motivation Doctor' believes that the media and our culture send the wrong messages about how to manage people. This makes it difficult for Business Owners, Managers and Team Leaders to motivate their staff and run their business.

Fairweather goes on to explain, "I believe there are four reasons why there are many poor and mediocre managers; one, because it's such a difficult job; two, nobody shows you what to do or gives you the right training; three, the media and our culture send the wrong message and four; some people are just not cut out to be managers."

Alan Fairweather's new book, How to be a Motivational Manager, is a down-to-earth guide for Managers and Team Leaders. It reveals how to motivate your team, get results and do it in the easiest, least stressful way possible

It introduces three vital factors in team motivation that don't include the 'tough
guy' approach.

The book was written by Fairweather to develop the skills of anyone whose job involves supervising others.

He understands the challenges faced by business people and knows how hard it is to motivate a team. He's used the skills described in this book with great success; and as he points out – "you don't, in fact, motivate other people; you create the environment where they motivate themselves," this book will show you how to do that.

Readers will learn how to spend quality time with their team members, build relationships and gain a better understanding of each individual.

They will also learn how to give feedback and coach employees, particularly when facing poor performance. And finally, they discover how, by believing in their people, they can utilise the skill, knowledge and experience that's already within their team.

Fairweather points out that a team's performance is determined by the relationship they have with their manager. Don't be misled, this isn't some kind of 'touchy-feely' approach; it shows managers how to deal with 'difficult' employees and any other kind of unproductive behaviour and still keep the team motivated.

The overall aim of the book is to support the Customer Service activities of the readers business, generate more sales and make life easier.

You don't have to be a tough guy to motivate your 'Apprentice' you just have to be 'tough enough to care.'

About the author: Alan Fairweather, The Motivation Doctor, has for the past fifteen years been turning 'adequate' managers and team leaders into consistent top performers. After a successful career as a manager he founded his business in 1993 and works with people and organisations consulting, speaking and running training programmes in the UK and Asia. He specialises in how to motivate people at work so that they deliver business results.

How to be a Motivational Manager is published by How To Books Ltd
http://www.howtobooks.co.uk/ and is available at £12.99 in major bookshops and online retailers across the country. ISBN 978-1-84528-225-7

If you would like to arrange an interview
or receive a review copy please contact Alan 07767 050462 alan@themotivationdoctor.com

www.themotivationdoctor.com

Alan has written a number of articles and is happy to contribute to your publication. Please see the list below for titles and word count.

• The 3 Secrets of Team Motivation: 527 words
  
• Discover How To Motivate Your Manager: 1219 words
  
• Why aren't you using feedback to motivate your team?: 419 words
  
• One Way to Deal with a Difficult Employee: 385 words
  
• 5 Action Ideas to Deal with Difficult People: 613 words
  
• Three Steps to Stop Absence and Make People Happy at Work: 937 words
  
• A Must Do Tactic That Will Improve your Team Motivation Skills: 474 words
  
• Team Motivation – are you tough enough to care?: 439 words
  
• Feedback – how to make it effective: 1116 words
  
• Poor Performance – fix it by coaching: 661 words
  
• Managing People – no more Mr Tough Guy: 914 words
  
• Pick People Who Think: 495 words
  

Power to Your People

I don’t know a thing about you, but I’ll bet if you’re a manager, then you probably think you’re pretty good at your job. Some managers seem to think that they should know everything about the job that their team members do, and be better than them at doing it.

I can remember, in the past, working for managers like that; they gave the impression that they knew everything and were far better than I would ever be at doing the job. This, of course, didn’t motivate me at all.

The Motivational Manager accepts that members of their staff may be better at doing the job than they are. Their staff may be better salespeople, better at customer service, better administrators or better engineers.

I’ve had salespeople working for me who were better at selling than I was, however, that made me no less a good manager.

Sir Alex Ferguson, the manager of probably the world’s most successful football club, Manchester United, had a pretty undistinguished career as a footballer. He did at one time play for Glasgow Rangers but could hardly be described as a star footballer; he is now, of course, a star manager.

If you manage or supervise other people, have confidence in yourself. Accept your limitations and don’t feel bad if you don’t initially know the answer to every question.
Ironically, it isn’t motivational for your staff, if you come up with the answers to all of their problems or queries.

Encourage your staff to come to you with solutions, not problems.

If you spend your time solving problems; you’ll spend your time solving problems!

When someone in your team asks you what they should do, even if you know the answer, reflect back the question. Ask them what they would do; ask for opinions. What do they think is the best course of action; why do they think it’s the best? What are the consequences of this action, for the customer, the business and the team member?

Empower, support and congratulate them on their decision. If they feel that they’ve made the decision, they will have more confidence in themselves and be more motivated to do the job even better.

What you’re essentially doing here is utilising the knowledge, skill, experience and motivational power that is already with in your team.
Believe me, once you apply this, you will have a highly motivated team who respect and trust you as a manager.

Sell Don't Tell

I'll always remember the first sales course I ever attended. The definition of selling was drummed into my brain. "Selling is the art of creating a desire in the mind of a buyer and satisfying that desire so that buyer and seller benefit."

Now this notion may seem a bit old fashioned for many of today's salespeople but this article isn't about selling. I believe the principle still holds true in many situations, especially when you want to achieve a 'win-win' outcome.

If you want one of your team members to do something, how do you approach them? You can 'tell' them what you want, but 'telling' just makes your job a lot harder. The Motivational Manager gets 'buy in', so everyone benefits. There's sometimes a case for 'telling' but it's hard work. Sometimes you have to keep telling them if you want results.

Here's how a Motivational Manager would do it:

• 
  Recognise that your team members are your 'internal customers'. You need them to 'buy' from you in order to get the job done. And in order to get them to buy; you need to be a good sales person. I'm sure you've heard the phrase - 'get buy in.'
  
• Get better results by selling not telling. Use good sales and persuasion skills when dealing with your team, your colleagues, even your boss. The sales or persuasion process is very much part of our world, and it's far better to sell than to tell.
  
• Focus on achieving a win-win outcome. Any good salesperson or negotiator knows, a 'win-win' outcome is what you should always aim for. If you want one of your team to do something and they see a benefit for them, or they're just happy to do it, then you have a 'win-win' situation.
  

"You can get everything you want in life if you just help enough other people to get what they want" - Zig Ziglar

Now you've no doubt noticed that I've started to talk about sales people and buyers. It's because I believe we're all sales people and buyers from the moment we enter this world till the moment we leave it.

A baby crying for food, attention or a change of nappy is trying to persuade you to take action. If you don't respond to this initial 'request' then they step up the volume until you do. Because we love that child, because we care, we are very open to their persuasion.

It follows throughout our life; if people care about us, if they respect us, if they have good rapport with us, then they're more likely to respond to our persuasion.

If people understand the benefits for them, then they're more likely to respond in a positive manner. You're on to a winner if you benefit as much as the other person. If you get into a 'win-lose' situation, then you may not have used selling or persuasion, but manipulation, control or coercion. A win-lose situation doesn't benefit anyone in the long run.

So whether we like it or not, selling and persuasion is going on all the time. You need to utilise these skills if you are to be a successful Motivational Manager.

Motivation – You don’t need a carrot or a stick

The term, Carrot and Stick alludes to enticing a horse or a donkey to move by dangling a carrot before it, so urging it forward.

The term should really be Carrot or Stick; the carrot being offered as a reward for moving forward and the stick used as a punishment for refusing to do so.

Some organisations and managers still use the Carrot or Stick approach to motivate their people. They reward good behaviour and punish bad behaviour.
However, that's not what motivation is all about because, you don't in fact motivate people; you create the environment where they motivate themselves.

So how do you do this? It's quite simple really; here are 3 points to think about:

1. Spend some quality time - You need to get to know the individuals in your team better and they need to get to know you. You'll gain a much better understanding of them and how they're handling the job. It will also give the impression that you care about them and show that you're there to help with problems both personal and business.

2. Give feedback and coach -You need to regularly tell each member of your team when they're doing well and when not so well. Some managers still believe - "Why should I praise people when they're only doing what they're paid to do." The Motivational Manager knows better! It's also important to tell people when they're not performing. There are too many managers who either ignore poor behaviour or come down on the person like a ton of bricks when they do something wrong. There are particular ways to give feedback and coach the individuals in your team and they need to be learned.

3. Be a believer - You need to empower each individual team member. It's important to utilise the knowledge, skill, experience and drive that's already within each individual. The majority of people in teams and organisations throughout the world are severely under utilised. Your team have probably more to offer in terms of skill, knowledge and experience and if you utilize that, you'll achieve your business goals and you'll lead a highly motivated team.

So there you have it; 3 very important points which will help you get the job of managing done and do it without carrots or sticks.

PS: Check out ‘How to be a Motivational Manager’ at Amazon.

Customer Service Training is a Waste of Time

A waste of time! That may sound a bit strange coming from someone who has delivered hundreds of customer service seminars over the past fifteen years. However, there are two provisos.

Customer service training is a waste of time unless managers, supervisors and team leaders:

1. Attend the same training

2. Are trained to motivate and coach their staff when they return to the workplace

Managers, supervisors and team leaders need to experience the training undergone by their staff and then support the training outcomes by daily on the job coaching.

They need to spend quality time with their staff, walking the job, listening and observing interactions with customers either face to face or on the telephone.

When they see or hear something they do like, they need to tell the team member about it. When they see or hear something they don’t like, they need to tell the team member about it.

It’s important to do this coaching in a positive and productive manner in order to support good behaviour and rectify not so good behaviour.

To help managers and supervisors become more successful, I’ve developed this stimulating and highly interactive seminar – Motivating for Customer Service. This will give managers, supervisors and team leaders, the skills and abilities that will help them motivate their staff and support the customer service efforts of their business.

For more details check out my website.